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Jan. 24, 2022

The Seven Silliest Supervillains | Puns, Puns, and More Puns

The Seven Silliest Supervillains | Puns, Puns, and More Puns

What's up Wikimaniacs? We are back with a spinoff of my (Josh) episode The Seven Strangest Superheroes and we are diving into weird villains throughout Marvel and DC's history!

At the end of the episode, we do a dramatic reading of a supervillain story that will definitely get us on Disney+. Enjoy!

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Images used:

https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Victoria_Murdock_(Earth-616)

https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Clifford_Michaels_(Earth-616)

https://www.deviantart.com/bdhalloween/art/Condiment-King-809977991

https://vsbattles.fandom.com/wiki/Trapster_(Marvel_Comics)

Transcript
Josh:

What is up WCA maniacs?

Josh:

My name is Josh shell and I will be your host for today as always.

Josh:

We have your boy, Sean.

Josh:

Salvino how's it

Josh:

going, Sean?

Sean:

popped a Molly to that new fucking intro.

Sean:

You better fucking believe it.

Sean:

I'm sweating.

Sean:

moly.

John:

a,

John:

is it a Molly or just because you're in Houston, right?

Sean:

Huh?

Sean:

No, the fucking, the fucking EDM shit out.

Sean:

Fucking rolling my tits out.

Sean:

Wow.

Josh:

and also with us, we have the master puns and beading John concept, nada.

Sean:

holy

Sean:

shit.

Josh:

How are,

Josh:

you

John:

You know, you're still pronouncing, you're pronouncing my last name wrong, but thank you for that compliment by.

Josh:

You know what?

Josh:

I'll get it eventually, just like to go.

John:

You got that now.

Sean:

yeah, it took him.

Sean:

It took him 25 episodes though.

Sean:

Just give

John:

That's true.

John:

Maybe it'll take another, take another 25 or so

Josh:

Yeah, it might take me awhile.

Josh:

Um, now how, how are you guys doing, it's been a while since we've talked, you know, A

Josh:

whole five minutes since our last recording.

Sean:

and the time it takes me to acquire MDM and also take the MTMA that's how long it's been.

Sean:

It's not two minutes.

Josh:

all right.

Josh:

Now, in today's episode, we are going to be doing a of a sequel to one of my previous episodes.

Josh:

I think this is the first time we'll ever have done this.

Josh:

as you may recall, my previous episode, the seven strangest superheroes, we are going to do a play on that because we're do count down the seven silliest super villains that I could find.

Josh:

These are according to me.

Josh:

So, I mean, any fan boys out there might disagree, but that's

Josh:

okay.

Sean:

wait to find out who frogman man's arch-nemesis was.

Josh:

You know what frogman, if I didn't already do them, he would have tactically made the list.

Josh:

Cause he wasn't a supervillain to start.

Sean:

he was on the first episode.

Sean:

Wasn't he?

Josh:

he, yeah, he was, he was, uh, yeah, has father or something was evil and then he ended

Josh:

up being a good guy, but we do find out one of his nemesis in this episode.

Josh:

So a little teaser, whether it's their name or power, all of these supervillains should be ashamed of who they are and should consider a rebrand.

Josh:

At the end of the episode, I'm taking a page from Sean and we're going to be reading a script from Reddit.

Josh:

Although I hate to disappoint everyone.

Josh:

It is PG, but it does allow John to do some voice acting.

Josh:

So

John:

All

Josh:

excited about that.

Sean:

loves that.

Sean:

shit.

John:

do love role-playing.

John:

I was gonna say foreplay, but

John:

yeah.

Sean:

Probably both.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

I wouldn't surprise anyone.

Josh:

I think.

John:

Master of puns and mess.

John:

Debaters

Josh:

Yeah, exactly.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

There you

Sean:

if you

Sean:

wicked maniac, if, if you don't like foreplay, that's on you, right.

Sean:

Foreplay is necessary.

Sean:

You know what I'm saying?

Sean:

Anyways,

Josh:

Like how, like how aggressively you came up with in the wake

Josh:

of me

Sean:

wicked maniacs.

Sean:

You should like that shit.

Josh:

oh, well, before we hop into the episode, though, we have some housekeeping to get to first off, please consider rating, reviewing and subscribing to the show on whatever platform you are using.

Josh:

Just like Jade who gave us a five star and is always a major thing at engaging us on Twitter.

Josh:

Uh, Jade said, well, this is the first, very first time I gave a review for any podcast.

Josh:

I'm always a fan of this show.

Josh:

God, their humor and chemistry and topics and humor.

Josh:

Yes.

Josh:

Again and everything.

Josh:

Just awesome.

Josh:

Keep it up guys.

Josh:

Love you, always the is awesome, but no one beats these three end quote.

Josh:

So thank you.

Josh:

For that amazing review Jade.

Josh:

I'm glad we can keep you entertained and keep the guys up that we're, we're all friends and not at each other's throats as soon as the camera's

Josh:

off.

Sean:

Well, I don't tell them too much, Josh.

Josh:

Yeah.

John:

man.

John:

Don't peek.

John:

Don't give him a peek behind the scene.

John:

We want them to give them, we want them to give us money.

John:

All right.

John:

We got

Josh:

as soon as the recording button's off,

Sean:

Yeah.

Josh:

John just berates us nonstop.

John:

the time.

Sean:

What a shitty episode, Shawn?

Sean:

The smart wasn't

Josh:

Can't believe,

Sean:

enough.

Josh:

can't believe you made me read that.

Josh:

You're sick.

Josh:

so thank you again, Jade.

Josh:

And if you want to support Reddit on Wiki financially, we are proud and I mean, proud members slash founders of the cultivate podcast network.

Josh:

So if you will, so if you, uh,

Sean:

No,

Josh:

no,

Sean:

we do need, we do need a name for the fans of cultivate.

Sean:

I was thinking, Brandon, let's go.

Sean:

Brandon, let's go Brett.

Josh:

Uh, so this is our final episode.

Josh:

You'll only be able to find us on Patriot.

Sean:

kidding.

Sean:

Wicked maniacs.

Sean:

Fuck Brandon.

Sean:

Fuck the proud

Josh:

Fuck.

Josh:

Fuck.

Josh:

Fuck Brandon.

Josh:

Right?

Josh:

Fuck.

Josh:

Fuck Brandon.

Josh:

No,

Sean:

It's his name?

Sean:

Fuck

John:

except Brandon URI.

Josh:

no I'm saying fuck the people that say fuck

Sean:

Oh.

Josh:

Yeah,

Sean:

Fuck the people that celebrate Brandon isn't Brandon like a code word for Trump or some shit like

Sean:

what's

Josh:

no, no.

Sean:

am I confused for Brandon?

Josh:

Biden?

Josh:

It's a coder

Josh:

for Biden.

Sean:

Oh, that's the code word for Biden.

Josh:

It's a mega saying shot.

Sean:

see, that's how out of date I am with the, the, I don't even know how they use the terminology.

Sean:

I just know Brandon is some stupid maggot thing that maggot people made up.

Josh:

You, you nailed

Josh:

it.

Josh:

you.

Josh:

nailed it.

Josh:

That, that time.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

so anyway, so if you want to support us on Patriot and go to patrion.com/cultivate podcast network, that's C U L T I V.

Josh:

The letter eight podcast network.

Sean:

The letter aid is kind of become a permanent thing

Sean:

now.

Josh:

That's our new

Sean:

Geez.

Sean:

People are at me.

Sean:

He's

Sean:

like, uh,

Sean:

these guys are really denim actually.

Sean:

I

Josh:

These guys are idiots.

Josh:

Um, you will get access to episodes a week early and ad free from us as well as from podcasts on the network.

Josh:

Like let's start a cult shots and thoughts dumped down dead and many more.

Josh:

All donations help support the shows in our network and allows us to keep making content for you.

Josh:

Lovely people.

Josh:

And finally, we'd like to give a shout out to our patrons,

John:

Patrons.

Josh:

patrons,

Sean:

I didn't say anything this time, guys.

Sean:

I didn't say anything.

Sean:

Just

Josh:

Thank you, Sean, for allowing me to be

Josh:

dyslexic.

Sean:

yourself.

Sean:

My guy.

Sean:

I gotta let you slip up sometimes some that's how I feel better about my American education versus your Canadian education.

Josh:

that's fair.

Josh:

I grew up in the woods though.

Josh:

Sean.

Josh:

I don't

Josh:

know if you'd want to

Sean:

Oh, we're probably the same.

Sean:

same.

Sean:

then.

Josh:

Um,

John:

up in a

Sean:

Goddammit.

Sean:

Uh, shout out to the cultivate, uh, social media for making the meme, the Spiderman meme with me in a Neanderthal.

Sean:

Me and my cousins.

Sean:

Yeah,

Josh:

your

Josh:

boys.

Sean:

and my

John:

Did you make that?

John:

Did you make that son?

Sean:

Yeah.

John:

Oh,

Josh:

Uh, so thanks to, Aaron Gabby, Lindsey Vienna.

Josh:

And, Taru we'll go with that.

Josh:

thank you

Josh:

for support.

Sean:

and if we mispronounced any of your names wrong, you guys have exclusive access to our Patrion exclusive discord, where you could just straight up tell us how to pronounce your name, or if you enjoy,

Sean:

or you could just yell Josh.

Sean:

He's white.

Sean:

He's easy.

Sean:

He's

Sean:

fine.

Josh:

You can yell at me.

Josh:

Yeah, it's fine.

Josh:

yeah, I can't even say patrons.

Josh:

Right.

Josh:

So, you know, it's gonna happen.

Josh:

but thank you again for supporting and uh, if you'd like to support us once again, go to patrion.com/cultivate podcast network, or use the link in the show notes with all of that out of the way, it is time to jump into the countdown of the seven silliest supervillains.

Josh:

you're excited.

Josh:

Do you have any guesses, Sean?

Josh:

You're kind of a nerdy guy.

Josh:

I started the

Josh:

last one off

Sean:

you were narrowed at a 10 for going by the old reviews.

Sean:

I was.

Sean:

Yeah, but the weird superheroes are, I'm trying to think of, like, I'm trying to think of some, but then I'm thinking about, I'm thinking about your last episode.

Sean:

Yeah.

Sean:

The supervillains thinking about your last episode.

Sean:

I had no idea who frogman was or any of those other guys.

Sean:

So, um, I'm assuming you went deep again.

Josh:

I did like, I usually do,

Sean:

Nice.

Sean:

Yo nice.

John:

Yes Pound it

Sean:

it much like you'll be doing later.

Sean:

Josh.

Sean:

Nice

John:

Yeah,

Sean:

homeowner,

Sean:

baby.

John:

nothing else to do cause he's locked down.

Josh:

exactly.

Josh:

Um, I th I feel John's going to like this episode, Sean.

Josh:

I apologize.

Josh:

There will be many

Sean:

I had a feeling and a

Sean:

feeling

Josh:

and kicking off the first one will be

Sean:

goddamn.

Sean:

Was that already

Sean:

one?

Josh:

no, no,

Sean:

a soccer player?

Josh:

Oh, God damn it.

Josh:

I wish I'd love to get, since we've just kicked off the new year while we were recording this, it's only fitting that we start with Clifford F Michaels.

Josh:

So Clifford was adopted as a young boy by millionaire Morgan McNeil Hardy.

Josh:

After his father passed away, Morgan Hardy was responsible for rebuilding the city of San Francisco after the 1906 San Francisco earthquake over the following decades, he would foster a hatred towards the show, social changes that made San Francisco, the progressive city that it became.

Josh:

So when he adopted Clifford, he tried to teach him the moral values of the early

Josh:

20th

Sean:

How NA oh,

Josh:

So to do this, he basically made Clifford a prisoner and restricted him access to the outside world to teach them the world before progressivism.

Josh:

Uh, can you guys already see where this is going?

Josh:

Uh,

Sean:

Is this Trump's origin story.

Josh:

yes.

Josh:

Yes.

Josh:

His name is, this forest Clifford to grow with a very, very conservative, morals and value.

Josh:

And as an adult, he hated the real world and all of this it's social changes.

Josh:

So he did the only logical thing.

Josh:

He got an early 19 hundreds haircut, a handlebar mustache dressed in a straw, boaters hat, striped, green jacket, and white trousers, and called himself the Turner de century.

Josh:

So Turner D century.

Sean:

We can make an X.

Sean:

You can hear me, but I am vigorously shaking my head chest already sick of

Sean:

this

Josh:

Oh yeah.

Josh:

I could like that.

Josh:

Ain't even got John, John even turned

Josh:

away

Sean:

And John loves this shit.

Sean:

Guy

Josh:

Oh, he loves

Sean:

loves this shit,

Josh:

God.

Sean:

Turner,

Sean:

DS and Sheree.

Sean:

Holy shit.

Josh:

a, after his first attack on San Francisco was stopped by spider woman, the mentally unstable Clifford broke out of prison and attempted to use the horn of time and kill everyone under the age of 65.

Josh:

That was a

Josh:

strategy.

Sean:

This guy is literally trying to make America great.

Sean:

Again, this is insane.

Josh:

The original,

Sean:

the original a

Sean:

guy.

John:

You said under 65, he's going to kill all of them.

Josh:

yeah.

Josh:

Yeah, that, that was

Josh:

his

Sean:

Would that kill himself?

Josh:

Oh, you know what?

Josh:

I didn't look up how old he

Josh:

was when

Sean:

He doesn't look

Josh:

storyline.

Josh:

No.

Josh:

Yeah, no, I don't think he would have been 65.

Josh:

So he might've died too.

Josh:

Unless it's like a clause where the horn of

Josh:

time user doesn't die.

Josh:

I don't

Sean:

That's true.

Sean:

That's true.

Josh:

either way.

Josh:

It doesn't matter.

Josh:

horn didn't work, no one was killed.

Josh:

He actually blew it and it just actually knocked everyone under 65 over for a second.

Sean:

The opposite reaction you could have guilt.

Josh:

He's like I did it.

Josh:

And then they all get back up and he's like, gosh, shit.

John:

Alerted everybody.

Josh:

so I think it's time we break down Turner D century's powers and abilities.

Josh:

So it says here that he is a normal man with normal strength, height, and build who engages in moderate exercise.

Josh:

And he appears to have some knowledge of history and a skill for inventing, which is just a, a normal

Josh:

dude.

Josh:

I think that's a normal everyday.

Sean:

of history or whatever that didn't work.

Josh:

you know what, I actually don't know if you've invented it.

Josh:

I'm going to say yes, because I have no idea.

Josh:

but he did invent a couple of weapons.

Josh:

So he carried around an old timey umbrella that shoots flames out of it at a short range,

Josh:

which is pretty

Sean:

kind of sick.

Sean:

I want one of those.

Josh:

pretty cool.

Josh:

and he had the horn of time, obviously that didn't work and

Josh:

he has

Josh:

a,

Sean:

just a

Josh:

just a horn,

Josh:

just regular horn talks to a bunch of people over it.

Josh:

That'd be kind of fun though.

Josh:

I'd fuck with a lot of

Josh:

people if I had that.

Sean:

people with a horn.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

If I knew it was like, I dunno something important, like, like, uh, like the NFL, like the super bowl when everyone stands for the national Anthem, just blow the

Josh:

horn.

Sean:

I thought you meant during the game

Sean:

effect, all those

Sean:

gamblers.

John:

No, my,

Josh:

The watch all of them, they're headed explodes of, I didn't stand for the national lab.

Josh:

and then, so

John:

I understand you now.

Josh:

I apologize.

Josh:

And he's like, yes, my child now rise.

Josh:

Um, he also has a tandem bicycle that can fly for unexplainable reasons

Sean:

Okay.

Sean:

So

John:

a

John:

tandem

Sean:

Googled this

Sean:

guy.

Sean:

He has a tandem bike and it looks like just a mannequin is writing the second seat.

Sean:

Is that

Josh:

I don't think he had a sidekick ever.

Josh:

So,

Sean:

is just a mannequin in the backseat with him

Sean:

flying.

Josh:

maybe that's the only one that could put up with his political

Josh:

views.

Sean:

Possibly.

John:

it's Brandon.

Josh:

It's branded

Josh:

that is

Sean:

Brandon is in the back, riding shotgun on the tandem.

Josh:

Uh, yeah, but, uh, Or let us Turner D page.

Josh:

No.

Josh:

No.

Sean:

Uh

Josh:

Okay.

Josh:

Any, any, any last, any last thoughts on Turner de century before we move on?

Sean:

Turn it the pay like in debt.

John:

move

John:

on.

Sean:

I actually think that might be the first part I liked.

Sean:

That was so bad that it was good Turner,

John:

the fuck.

Sean:

I'm into it.

Sean:

I'm into it.

Sean:

Josh.

Sean:

Do I like

John:

course you would be.

Josh:

w we're turning it around now, John, John hated it and you loved

John:

I fucking hated

John:

it.

Sean:

we're in the upside down.

Josh:

moving on to number six, born in gray, Indiana.

Josh:

Peter Petrosky became a research scientist in New York city while working at a company.

Josh:

Patented up multi polymer adhesive that made them very rich.

Josh:

And to top scientists in his field, John is also a top scientist in making things sticky.

Josh:

I had to throw that in there.

Sean:

Oh,

Sean:

wait, we gotta have a, we have to have a shirt in the shop that says five time,

Josh:

Five

Sean:

the five and X five time world

Sean:

champ.

John:

five X

Josh:

Uh, just a picture of his hand with like

John:

Yeah.

John:

Five X, 2.3.

John:

Ain't enough, man.

John:

I need five shout out to Maggie.

Sean:

It will be a white t-shirt for sure.

Josh:

yeah, yeah.

John:

Oh my God.

John:

Maybe we could get, I was going to say like, if we had the technology to make it fucking black

John:

light,

Sean:

Oh,

Sean:

just five times and blank

John:

genius.

Sean:

actually handmade these myself.

Sean:

Uh,

Josh:

Don't wash it.

John:

Don't wash it, you know?

Josh:

Oh God.

Josh:

so instead of continuing, uh, so back back to Peter, so instead of continuing his successful career, he decided to turn to a life of crime because he considered it to be more lucrative.

Josh:

dawning, one of the stupidest costumes I've ever seen and creating a patented pastes gun, Peter became known as the criminal known as paced pot,

Josh:

Pete.

Sean:

Jeez.

Sean:

Uh, rised

Josh:

And if you look this guy up, Sean, he is, he just looks like an idiot.

Josh:

He's got like a, a dumb purple beanie and a bow tie.

Josh:

Let's just very large.

Josh:

And it just, none of it really makes

Josh:

sense.

Josh:

Um,

John:

It looks like an

John:

idiot.

Sean:

He looks like he has a ball sack hanging from his neck.

John:

I was going to

Sean:

What is that?

Josh:

That's this Peter.

Josh:

Oh, okay.

Josh:

So pay spot, Pete became a recurring villain and a heel to the human torch, which is pretty stupid because I'm pretty sure glue is useless against the man who is literally on fire.

Josh:

But, later on, he begins to resent his persona and rebrands himself as the trapster

Josh:

and

Sean:

That's a better

Sean:

name.

Josh:

Yeah, it is

Sean:

That's a way better

Sean:

name.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

it was an attempt to make him sound more menacing, which I think anything would have been more medicine than

Josh:

paced pot, Pete.

Sean:

like a restaurant or at least like a hot sauce or like something.

Josh:

Yeah.

John:

pot restaurant.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

It's funny.

Josh:

You mentioned hot sauce.

Josh:

We'll get there

Josh:

eventually.

Sean:

Oh no, there's a hot sauce.

John:

Oh,

Josh:

um,

John:

Josh did Josh.

John:

His mortal enemy

Josh:

hot sauce.

John:

still spicy avocado.

John:

What is this?

Josh:

so pizza abilities include being a genius level, chemist and inventor, allowing him to make his patented paste gun that allowed him to fire a stream of blue, that dries instantly with the gun.

Josh:

You can trap opponents, jam machinery, build walls, and form a lasso that allows him to swing much like Spiderman.

Sean:

I'm confused.

Sean:

He was, he was rich.

Sean:

He was a rich Camus.

Sean:

So why, why turn to crime?

Josh:

you know what?

Josh:

Yeah, he was just, he's like, I can do better than this.

Josh:

And I don't.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

I don't know.

Josh:

It didn't, it didn't really state his motivations.

Josh:

He was just like, I'd rather go to crime because that's more lucrative.

Josh:

It said, and it was like, well,

Josh:

is it

Sean:

is

Sean:

it

Sean:

you're pretty rich as it is.

John:

He wants to be a heel.

John:

Okay.

Sean:

mean, yeah, that's fine.

Sean:

That's

Sean:

fine.

John:

Let him be.

Josh:

It could be a CEO and still be a he'll just look at Jeff Bezos,

Josh:

Elon Musk, all

Josh:

of them.

John:

right there.

Sean:

Oh man, when he rebranded, he got a way better car.

Josh:

Oh yeah.

Josh:

He

Josh:

looks sick.

Sean:

Uh, way

Josh:

just so so much cooler.

Josh:

after he rebranded though, it's a fun fact about a pay spot, or the, uh, the trapper is that he had one weakness.

Josh:

Can you guys guess what this was?

John:

getting stuck on them.

John:

I don't know,

Josh:

Oh no.

Josh:

his

Josh:

his weakness was water.

Josh:

I mean, probably that'd be honest, but now his weaknesses name calling.

Josh:

So

Josh:

when

Sean:

no way

Josh:

after he changed to the trap stare, he became enraged.

John:

sticks and stone don't break my balls or please don't call me names.

Sean:

I was in a weird place in my life back then.

Sean:

You, we don't bring a paste upon Pete.

Sean:

I'm the

Sean:

trapster.

Josh:

You I'll get, I'll get sticky stuff all over you.

Josh:

that is a paste pot, Pete.

Josh:

couldn't think of a pun for this one.

Josh:

So we'll, we'll just, we'll just move on

John:

on.

John:

Stick to something you're good

John:

at

Josh:

stick to something.

Josh:

You're good.

Josh:

I Thank

Josh:

you

Josh:

Thank

Sean:

See, I like turned to paid.

Sean:

I like Turner to page more than not loving.

Sean:

Now one,

Josh:

it's just, when I say ponds, Sean

Josh:

likes, and maybe that

Sean:

That's what it

John:

probably what it is.

John:

Well, you know, Sean, at least you're the glue that keeps us a group together.

Sean:

God damn it.

Sean:

God fucking dammit.

Josh:

And come back, Sean,

John:

Don't leave us.

Josh:

moving on to number five, we have all of these are Marvel almost.

Josh:

So this sucks because I love

Sean:

Fun fact.

Sean:

Every time you mentioned like a city that exists, I'm like, oh, okay.

Sean:

Another Marvel character.

Josh:

yeah,

Josh:

that's

Sean:

Cause DC is all made up.

Sean:

Towns,

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

It's like Gotham

Josh:

and yeah.

Josh:

so Victoria Murdoch was the sister of killer Murdoch, who was a racketeer and her brother.

Josh:

so she used her brother's connections to become a criminal scientist.

Josh:

All of these people are scientists.

Josh:

I want to, I want that to sink in.

Sean:

does Marvel think science is bad,

Josh:

That's that's the, from what I read, that's what they think.

Josh:

Like every Marvel villain is a scientist.

Josh:

That's just gone bad.

Josh:

Right?

Josh:

Like all the Spider-Man villains, all of

Josh:

these villains,

Sean:

to be fair, I guess, I guess the superheroes are also scientists to Spider-Man scientists, iron man sign.

Josh:

Cap was just a Jack dude that got

John:

He was a skinny

John:

dude, turned

Sean:

He's just super

Sean:

nice.

Josh:

So, I mean, yeah.

Josh:

Scientist or inventor.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

That's the easy way to go to get people powers, I guess.

Josh:

Anyway, she hated the human torch, I wanted to find a way to combat him.

Josh:

So she designed a super suit that made her immune to fire while wearing it.

Josh:

Do you guys have any guesses as to what this suit was

Josh:

made?

Sean:

It sounds like some, oh, I thought you were going to ask for a name and I was going to be like, it sounds like it could be very politically incorrect.

Sean:

What their

Sean:

name would be.

Josh:

No, no, no, no, no, nothing, nothing.

Josh:

It's not political.

Josh:

I know.

Josh:

We always like to go there.

Josh:

It's not political.

Josh:

It is just dumb.

Josh:

so think combating fire, where does your head go?

Josh:

Thinking?

Josh:

Uh,

John:

Aluminum foil.

Josh:

Okay.

Sean:

Uh,

Josh:

not, that's a good, yes.

Josh:

The good ice.

Josh:

Also a dumb

Josh:

guests.

Josh:

Cause

Sean:

But it's a, it's a dumb superhero.

Sean:

So I'm thinking it's a dumb guess.

Sean:

You

Sean:

know what I'm

Sean:

saying?

Josh:

no, no, no, no.

Josh:

I'm not.

Josh:

I'm not saying, I'm saying it's a dumb guest.

Josh:

Isn't a good guest.

Josh:

Like it's a good guest.

Josh:

Cause it was so dumb.

Sean:

I

John:

run out.

John:

Sorry, your

Sean:

yeah.

Sean:

Thanks.

Josh:

Uh, but no, sadly you were both wrong.

Josh:

because Victoria made her suit out of the completely safe material known as Bestos.

Sean:

no,

John:

God.

Josh:

Yes.

Josh:

The building material that the boomer generation used to insulate their houses and is linked to countless lung conditions and cancer and an entire generation of

Josh:

people.

Sean:

what did, okay.

Sean:

So I Googled her as well, and we are to two out of three, have been human torch villains.

Josh:

There's a surprising large amount of

Josh:

them.

Sean:

I'm starting to think they were just fucking with the human torch, right?

Josh:

so that might be true.

Josh:

the reason, the reason was that she was going off of a, at the human torch was because, he put her brother away

Josh:

basically,

Sean:

Hmm.

Josh:

which led him to getting executed by the

Sean:

I see hers.

Sean:

I see her super villain name is also as best as aslani.

Josh:

I was getting to that.

Josh:

Yeah.

Sean:

sorry.

Sean:

I'm sorry.

Sean:

I ruined it.

Sean:

My bed.

Josh:

especially those lady, so a very clever name.

Josh:

Uh, she done done the asbestos suit, with its fire resistant property and, , went on to combat the human torch.

Josh:

Victoria was a gifted scientist as all of these super villains seem to be this allowed her to create the fireproof and cancer inducing suit for good measures.

Josh:

She also carried a flame thrower and a handgun that shot

Josh:

a specimen,

Sean:

They're shot as best as that's shot asbestos

Josh:

asbestos bullets.

Sean:

whole holy moly.

Josh:

I guess the reasoning was because it could the bullets, if they were covered in as best as they could penetrate the human torch, I don't like that

Josh:

was their thinking.

Sean:

What's this Bestos at that time, not known to be as destructive

Sean:

as it

John:

fuck.

John:

No.

Josh:

Probably not back

Josh:

in the seventies

John:

A lot, or I was going to say a lot of the military housing that I've lived in.

John:

There's like traces of asbestos and like the, the paint led, same thing, like insane.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

It wasn't until like the eighties or nineties that they were like, yeah, we probably stopped doing this.

Sean:

that's

John:

What else?

John:

What else?

John:

Like radon, all that stuff.

John:

It was all over a soil.

John:

Like Jesus, didn't give a fuck about it.

John:

As long as it's cheap.

Sean:

The supervillain definitely accidentally killed themselves over time.

Sean:

The one.

Josh:

you know, I'm S God damaged.

Josh:

Did you read, did you

Josh:

read my script

Sean:

No, I'm just, I'm just guessing she had his best suit, so,

Josh:

unfortunately she never managed to accomplish a goal of bringing down the humans torch because at the age of 45, she died at what was alluded to as lung cancer.

John:

oh

Josh:

Yeah.

Sean:

Marvel, too real.

Josh:

well, I guess they brought like attention to the subject.

Josh:

So

John:

Oh, that's true.

Josh:

kind of a good

Sean:

best us is bad.

John:

I guess, I guess she was, she was a what'd you call that, you know, the there's isn't there a commercial always about that claim.

John:

Like if you've been exposed to as best as you

John:

can,

Sean:

Oh yeah,

Sean:

yeah.

John:

what is it?

John:

Fuck.

John:

I don't know what it's

Sean:

Yeah.

Sean:

I was about to say miso soup.

Josh:

drink some miso soup and you'll be better.

Sean:

That

John:

He started Leila

Sean:

something that.

Josh:

yeah.

John:

like a compensation.

John:

Yeah.

Josh:

yeah, so she unfortunately does die, which is sad, but I think not surprising to anyone, from this

Josh:

century.

Sean:

a lot of his best dose.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Any thoughts before we move on?

John:

Fuck.

John:

That's.

Sean:

John, you're

Josh:

All right.

Sean:

a pun.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Yeah, I think it's,

John:

Um, oh, wait, hold on.

John:

Am I supposed to hit you guys with

Josh:

no, I got, I

Sean:

Oh,

John:

Okay, go ahead.

John:

Go ahead.

John:

Go ahead.

John:

Go ahead.

John:

Go

John:

ahead.

Josh:

I think it's a best dose that we move on.

Sean:

I liked that.

Sean:

I liked

Sean:

that.

Sean:

I liked

John:

job.

John:

Good job.

Josh:

roll into the next super villain, which I think is number five

Josh:

for

Sean:

Wait, are we doing seven?

Sean:

We doing seven.

Sean:

So number

Sean:

four.

Josh:

Number four.

Josh:

Thank you for keeping track Sean numbers guy.

Josh:

That's what we always

Sean:

Yeah, I've been known to be really good at math.

Sean:

Uh,

John:

quick

Sean:

Yeah,

Josh:

now I'm trying to think.

Josh:

Did I do actually five or, so Jackson wheel was a corrupt businessman who embezzled money from his company and he hired rocket racer who was another super villain.

Josh:

And from what I can tell is just some dude on a rocket powered skateboard.

Josh:

So, you know, run, run runner up for this list, but, uh, he did not make it, Anyway, Jackson hired rocket racer to steal the documents that had incriminated him and embezzling money.

Josh:

racer managed to get the documents, but demanded that Jackson pay an additional 10,000 or else he would give it to authorities.

Josh:

I told you, he wasn't a good guy, but it's also just like ripping off bad guys.

Josh:

So I dunno, kind of an

John:

Balance balance balance.

John:

That's

Josh:

the balanced, so Jackson, unable to, or unwilling to pay that much, decided to just try and commit suicide by jumping off a

Josh:

dock.

Sean:

my God,

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

They were

John:

problematic.

Sean:

not a superhero.

Sean:

He made somebody commit or try

Josh:

Well, no, well I guess yeah, well racer.

Josh:

Okay, so racer didn't make him do it.

Josh:

He just was like, pay me.

Josh:

He didn't, I don't think he expected him to try and kill himself.

Sean:

Fair.

Josh:

cause he tried to jump off the dock, but was saved by none other than rocket racer who refused to let them die before being paid.

Josh:

So there's that

John:

want my money back.

Sean:

me my money.

Josh:

but instead of paying Jackson hired a scientist named the tinkerer to create a weapon, powerful enough to defeat rocket

Sean:

Oh, the tinker.

Sean:

I do know him

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

He, he actually, I think he built the rocket skateboard for the rocket racers.

Josh:

he's done.

Josh:

He is.

Josh:

He's a big villain.

Josh:

I don't know if he's actually a villain.

Josh:

He's just kind of

Sean:

For hire.

Josh:

Yeah, basically.

Josh:

so the tinkerer built him this giant armored wheel, just one wheel, with a machine gun and rocket launchers and Jackson became known as big wheel.

John:

Wow.

Sean:

Oh

Sean:

man.

Josh:

the toy.

Sean:

Sometimes I'm like the descriptive names are so bad, but then like something stick Spider-Man I guess is not that descriptive human torch.

Sean:

Not that great

Sean:

iron man, but I

Sean:

don't know.

Sean:

Big

Sean:

wheel seems set to fail right from the gym.

Josh:

and, uh, to give you like, so it is basically just like a large looking Ferris wheel that he can just drive around.

Josh:

And there's little mobility like our, uh, maneuverability, I guess you'd say because it's a fucking one wheel.

John:

here.

Josh:

So, and this comes into play because during his fight first fight with rocket racer, big wheel lost control and drove off the side of a building and into

John:

my

Josh:

into the Hudson river where he was presumed

Josh:

dead.

Sean:

I thought you were going to say off a

Sean:

dock and be like, wow, poetic justice.

Josh:

Well, the river, I guess that kind of brings it back.

Josh:

It should have been a dock.

Josh:

You're right.

Josh:

You're a better writer already shot.

Sean:

you.

Sean:

Thank you.

Josh:

he wasn't dead and would come back later.

Josh:

and actually he had like a, a spurt where he was just like a monster truck racer.

John:

Oh, I thought he turned to a monster truck.

John:

I'm like,

John:

what the

Josh:

no, no, no, no, no.

Josh:

He just re like, I think it was Spiderman or one of them convinced him to become

Josh:

just a

Josh:

monster truck driver.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

But he, you know, lapses back and becomes bad again.

Josh:

And, uh, he would later come back only to be killed as, as he was knocked off of a cliff.

John:

Oh,

Sean:

Micah.

John:

a lot of traction in those wheels is that,

Josh:

No, no, not one wheel.

Josh:

If he had to,

Josh:

you could

Sean:

Yeah.

Sean:

Is there a brake system with the wheel?

Sean:

It seems like he just consistently runs off things.

Josh:

No, I think

John:

look, it's like Sonic,

Sean:

He should've just attached machine guns to the fucking monster truck that has four wheels.

John:

right?

Sean:

you doing?

Sean:

My guy.

Josh:

To be fair.

Josh:

I don't know if he actually drove a monster truck.

Josh:

I think he actually just drove the big wheel in a monster truck arena.

Sean:

Oh, I'm fucking dead.

John:

He is too.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Oh shit.

Josh:

So I don't even know if it's worth going into his powers because he didn't have any other than just driving a fucking wheel.

Josh:

Um, I say we just roll past and onto the next

Josh:

villain.

Josh:

There it is.

Josh:

There it is.

Josh:

Number three, I think, Hubert carpenter lived with his eccentric uncle, Hugh, uh, sorry, Hebrew.

Josh:

Uh, God damn it.

Josh:

They have such stupid

Josh:

fucking

Sean:

Is he a carpenter?

Josh:

Que Hubert carpenter lived with his eccentric uncle Humber.

Josh:

Who also happened to be who also happened to be a mad scientist?

John:

Again,

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Again, there's another scientist.

Josh:

so I guess the last guy was a businessman, but he worked with a scientist, Humbert, we conducted spirit experiments on young Hubert and after 10 years of trying to give Hubert the ability of different animals and failing.

Josh:

So he was trying to give, like, I dunno like, like as, as a hypothetical, he was trying to give Hubert like a cheetah, like super speed or something like that, or a gorilla super strength, but all of those failed until he found inspiration in the Beatles album, the magical mystery

Sean:

Are they fast?

Josh:

We'll get to that.

Sean:

The strength I can see.

Sean:

Yeah.

Sean:

That might be good at GLT.

Sean:

And speed seemed like bad

Josh:

Uh, not good at all.

Josh:

as described in the comics, Huber wasn't the brightest individual and was course by his uncle to go into a life of crime calling himself.

Josh:

You guessed it, the walrus,

Sean:

six.

Josh:

all of this wasn't bad enough, as you may remember from my superhero episode, our good friend, the fabulous frogman was the one who ended up sorting the walrus.

Sean:

Oh man.

Josh:

in, so it was, there was a bunch of them fighting and the frogman happened to jump on the walrus as his superpowers gave out.

Josh:

So, so the walrus collapse.

Josh:

And, he just happened by chance to have been the last one to touch him.

Josh:

So they gave him the credit for getting this guy.

Sean:

Wow.

Josh:

here's our boy, the fabulous frog man.

Josh:

Greatest superhero to ever live.

Josh:

When's that goddamn Marvel movie.

Sean:

It's so wild that fraught frogman exists and there's like a straight up X-Men villain just named toad.

Sean:

Like that is way better.

Sean:

Like

Josh:

Way

Sean:

what's the need.

Josh:

Well, he's a toad

Josh:

and this guy is a

Sean:

Oh, okay.

Sean:

right, right, right, right.

Sean:

right.

John:

Grown ass men

Josh:

for anyone who missed it.

Josh:

He's not an actual frog.

Josh:

He just has, what was it like hydraulic

Josh:

legs that make

Sean:

No, I think he just has really fancy boots that make him jump high, but

Sean:

uncon,

John:

can't even control.

Sean:

control it.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

He just jumps everywhere.

Josh:

Yeah, that was what it was so stupid.

Josh:

I'm not trying to be like you, my boy.

Josh:

Um, As stated the wall versus power, where that he had the strength, speed and agility of a walrus and the comic book.

Josh:

This made him obviously like as a comic book, it's not reality.

Josh:

It made them better, but fun fact in real life, he would actually become slower and weaker than your

Josh:

average human,

Sean:

Wait Wallace's are weaker than humans.

Josh:

I guess.

Josh:

So like maybe comparatively bodies suddenly they don't have to lift a lot.

Josh:

Right.

Josh:

They just

Josh:

float.

Sean:

true.

Sean:

I just imagine getting tackled by a walrus would be painful.

Josh:

Oh, they're probably heavy, but I

John:

Big boys.

Sean:

Maybe they can't pick enough speed to you.

Sean:

To even get a good tackle,

John:

Bounce around.

Josh:

Listen, if there was a walrus near me, I'd be afraid, but I wouldn't fucking, I could run away pretty easily.

Josh:

I think, it would make more sense of his, his super, like his heel was Aqua or not Aquaman, but, um, who's the fucking Marvel.

Sean:

Damore,

Josh:

More that's it.

Josh:

Or the sub Mariner so much dumber, but it'd be that at least make more sense.

Josh:

Right.

Josh:

You'd be like, oh, he's good at swimming, you know?

Josh:

Anyway,

Sean:

But then he could just sell him like a whole bunch of real ass versus fuck him up.

Josh:

true.

Josh:

You just have to fight his own kind.

Sean:

He'll get this bitch.

Josh:

just murdering walruses.

Josh:

Oh God, I couldn't think of a walrus pun.

Josh:

John, you got anything for this one?

John:

You're going to think of a button.

Josh:

No, no, no, no.

Josh:

Ah, that was not scripted.

Josh:

Anyway.

Josh:

If anyone thinks and Sean's back

John:

Yes,

John:

his lips was sealed.

John:

He was like, I couldn't say anything about this shit.

Josh:

Jesus Christ.

Sean:

to risk.

Josh:

Oh, all right.

Sean:

it.

Josh:

Moving on to number.

John:

you okay.

John:

There you go.

John:

Okay.

John:

There,

John:

buddy.

Sean:

Let's let's finish it.

Josh:

he's good.

Josh:

He's good.

Josh:

Wilbur day was a scientist employed by Carl Caxton who invented a hydraulic Ram device, which is a completely normal thing to

Josh:

invent.

Sean:

Hydraulic ramp.

Sean:

Okay.

Josh:

I don't know.

Josh:

Anyway, Wilbur store stole, Caston's designs and use them to build himself a pair of extremely long telescopic legs that allowed him to tower over everything going by the name stilts man Wilbur became a recurring villain of Daredevil

Josh:

and she has.

Sean:

was going to say, I do know this one,

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

He's,

Josh:

he's

Sean:

he was, I think is a, what do you call it?

Sean:

His costume was teased in Daredevil on the Netflix series,

Sean:

but you just see it in the background, like in the, in the

Sean:

tinkerer stuff,

Sean:

but.

Josh:

yeah.

Josh:

You know, there are worse.

Josh:

Like it's not the worst costume.

Josh:

He just kind of looks like, like a tall iron man, I guess, would be the best description.

Josh:

besides the still suit, allowing him to extend up to 290 feet, he didn't really have any other abilities.

Josh:

but fun fact, he did also have the nickname, daddy long legs,

John:

Nice.

Sean:

hell yeah.

Sean:

Brother.

Josh:

is just gross and kind of funny,

Josh:

to

Josh:

make

Sean:

so funny that he, like, I first saw him, I was like, okay, so legs and arms can extend.

Sean:

And he's kind of like, Mr.

Sean:

Fantastic.

Sean:

Just legs.

Sean:

Just legs.

Josh:

Just

Josh:

legs.

Josh:

He just gets really

Sean:

So he's just 290 feet up in the air.

Sean:

Can't reach

Sean:

nothing.

Sean:

Can't do

Josh:

probably can't even barely see what he's doing down at, down at 290 feet down.

Josh:

He's like, ah, maybe stepping on people.

Josh:

I don't know.

Josh:

, to make this, , even more interesting and more dumb at the same time, a woman named Kelly, Ryan took up the mantle of stilt, man.

Josh:

She did change the name.

Josh:

However, now, can you guys guess what she changed the name to?

John:

I don't know, mama something

Sean:

long legs.

John:

long legs.

Josh:

I do like that.

Josh:

so instead of going by, you know, something like stilt woman, which is still it's as dumb as stilt man, but at least it's, you know, coherent.

Josh:

It makes sense.

Josh:

she instead went with lady stilt, man.

Sean:

just let, just lady still just lady

Josh:

That would have been better.

Sean:

just drop the man lady still.

Sean:

What are we, what are we doing here?

Josh:

I mean, I guess if she wanted, like, yeah, I don't know.

Josh:

I don't know

John:

trying to be

John:

inclusive.

Sean:

yeah, I was going to say, is she possibly?

Sean:

No, but even then lady,

Sean:

man is lady.

Sean:

Man is.

Sean:

is.

Josh:

It's still

Josh:

a, it is offensive.

Sean:

I'm pretty sure that's pretty offensive because you're either, I guess there's the non, what is it?

Sean:

Uh, not

Sean:

non-binary but,

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

but,

Sean:

no, there's no lady.

Sean:

Boy.

Sean:

It's ladies and boys

Josh:

or,

Josh:

yeah.

Josh:

Whatever.

Sean:

or non-binary

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

So, I think, I honestly just think it was a terrible writing

Josh:

decision other than,

Sean:

you, you have to know when you're writing that you there's no way you don't know

Josh:

Yeah.

Sean:

still, man, lady stilts.

Sean:

Ladies,

Josh:

Yeah, ladies stilts,

Josh:

that

Sean:

what did we do?

Josh:

rolls off the

Josh:

tongue better.

Sean:

Or just

Sean:

stilts there has, there doesn't need to be any, uh, no gender.

Sean:

If anything, you're giving yourself away.

Sean:

Like you could be anything if you're just

Josh:

That's true.

Josh:

And you keep

Josh:

your disguise

Sean:

you keep your, uh,

Josh:

maybe, it's the man.

Josh:

Maybe it's a woman.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

I liked that.

Josh:

Sean Should

Josh:

rewrite a lot

Sean:

I write comics guy?

John:

There you go.

Josh:

I think you easily could cause it, it looks easy back in the seventies, so you can just whatever you want

Josh:

and put it

Sean:

lady is just popping up.

John:

Go back to time and plugin do it.

Josh:

Yeah.

Sean:

this great idea.

Sean:

Just stilts, just stills.

Sean:

Um,

Josh:

all right.

Josh:

That is it for this, dumb supervillain, it's time to extend on over to the super-villain of the hour and,

Sean:

I think my time of liking punters ended

Josh:

Yeah, that's fair.

Josh:

That's fair.

Josh:

It was a weaker one.

Josh:

It wasn't

Sean:

Hey, you got two on me.

Sean:

You got two on

Josh:

Oh, that's fair to two to three.

Josh:

I'll take it.

Josh:

We're not done yet.

Josh:

There's still more.

Josh:

so this is what I consider to be the dumbest super villain, but I believe John will absolutely love this villain for some specific reasons.

John:

Oh,

Josh:

So vault for multiple reasons, I guess, technically, so most of the dumb villains I ha I have been, unfortunately talking about have been Marvel.

Josh:

Uh, I love Marvel.

Josh:

I'm a big fan of all the movies.

Josh:

I love all the characters and I think it's time to finally put DC on blast.

Sean:

saved them the top spot.

Josh:

yeah, yeah.

Josh:

For good reason, I'm going to relish in this.

Josh:

Um, so buddy Standler was a standup comedian, which I will give it to DC.

Josh:

They didn't just use mad scientist.

Josh:

I, I liked that.

Josh:

Apparently it was a crutch for Marvel for a long time.

Josh:

so anyway, buddy also judged an annual standup comedy competition during which they rejected a comedian named Shecky rim shop rim shot.

Josh:

What a name, who turned out to be the joker in disguise and Denton.

John:

okay.

Josh:

The joker obviously took this personally and kidnapped buddy and took control of his mind much like Harley Quinn, how he like kind of changed her, as payback for rejecting him.

Josh:

The joker gave him the dumbest power of all and forced buddy to wield condiments as a weapon.

Sean:

oh, this is the hot sauce

Sean:

guy.

Josh:

This is the hot says, that's right.

Josh:

You heard it

Sean:

sauce guy.

Josh:

mustard.

Josh:

Catch-up you fucking name it?

Josh:

And he used it as a

Sean:

is my fucking nightmare.

Sean:

To be honest, not this isn't Josh's nightmare.

Sean:

This is my nightmare.

Sean:

I fucking hate

Josh:

It's so stupid.

Josh:

I love condiments, but, and I know John, I know John does.

Josh:

He loves food and stuff, so I knew he would like it for that

Josh:

there's

Josh:

sauce boss.

Josh:

There's more

Sean:

Don't get me wrong.

Sean:

I'll vote with a sauce, but ketchup mustard, not now.

Josh:

Okay.

Josh:

Let's

John:

on what catch up though.

John:

Depends on what type of catch up.

John:

There's some gourmet catch up.

Josh:

Um,

Josh:

yeah.

Josh:

Heinz came out with, do you guys

Josh:

have Heinz down

Sean:

Yeah, we have

John:

Heinz Heinz is

John:

disgusting.

Sean:

the most popular Brian Bryant Bryant.

Josh:

Brian.

Sean:

Holy

John:

Oh, that is a type of, you know,

Josh:

pickle juice.

Sean:

That's the most popular brand of ketchup probably is Heinz.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

they have like that whole new arrangement.

Josh:

Like they have the Mayo ketchup,

Josh:

they call them

Sean:

Oh yeah.

Sean:

Mayo up and let the fucking,

Sean:

the mixed

Josh:

they have a ranch ketchup.

Josh:

It's weird.

Josh:

So, going by the alias condiment king buddy proceeded.

Sean:

That's a good restaurant.

Sean:

Name is a good food

Josh:

I forgot.

Josh:

It was just like the burger king, the condiment king, buddy proceeded to torment Gotham with condiments and terrible puns.

John:

yes.

Sean:

This

Sean:

is this.

John:

I will, I will relish the story.

Josh:

I, so that's what I said.

Josh:

I'll relish.

Josh:

It was it, it

John:

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, let, let, let, let, let Shawn catch up with his breath and real quick while he's groaning.

Josh:

You good?

Josh:

Sean.

Josh:

You good?

John:

Uh,

John:

he's uh, he's in a bit of a pickle.

John:

He he's in a bit of a pickle right now.

John:

Leave him be

Sean:

That's not a

Josh:

bit of a stress.

Sean:

That's not a

Josh:

of a

Josh:

stretch with that.

Josh:

so he proceeded, proceeded to torment Gotham with condiments and terrible puns, armed with a giant gun that contained canisters of mustard, ketchup, Mayo, Saracho, relish, and any other condiment you

Sean:

This is legit.

John:

shout out to sir, shout out to Serratia though.

John:

I give them props

Sean:

Oh, he had Serratia.

Sean:

He used to listen to Raja.

Josh:

Oh, I don't know.

Josh:

It's a hot sauce.

Josh:

I just took

Josh:

it.

John:

okay.

John:

Oh, I was going to give

John:

him

Josh:

It was creative Liberty.

Josh:

Okay.

Sean:

red

John:

got you.

John:

I got you.

John:

I got you.

Josh:

so Conaman king went to the fanciest restaurant in Gotham and threatened the patrons or Patriots with his, with his guns, spraying them with hot sauce, which to be fair would suck that would hurt.

Josh:

Um, luckily got a Batman showed up though.

Josh:

I think a security guard would have been enough to take them to.

Josh:

now I did mention that he terrorized Gotham with puns, and I thought it was only fair that our punny boy, John read out some of the puns he made in the comics.

Josh:

So John, can you open up these, thing that I sent you

John:

fuck.

John:

Yes.

Josh:

the quotes in order

John:

let me find it real

John:

quick.

Josh:

best?

Josh:

Uh, well, yeah.

Josh:

How you imagine evil supervillain, standup comedian with.

John:

All right.

John:

Who do you ask?

John:

Why the cap, who do you ask?

John:

Why?

John:

And a captain of ketchup.

John:

Of course, the master of mustard, the Monarch of Mayo himself, the condiment king.

John:

Ah, the big, bad, bad guy.

John:

I knew you'd catch up to me sooner or later.

John:

How I've relished this meeting you the dynamic dark night versus me, the conceptual condiment king come Batman.

John:

Let's see, you can cut the mustard.

John:

Parting is such sweet and sour sorrow.

Sean:

I mean, kudos to the voice acting

Sean:

fantastic.

Sean:

Work the script.

Sean:

Oh

Sean:

my

Sean:

God.

Josh:

That is just chef, chef Boyardee kiss.

Josh:

That is amazing.

Josh:

but parting is such sweet and sour.

Josh:

Unfortunately we have to part ways for a few minutes for some ads.

Josh:

when we return, we will be acting out a script from Reddit.

Josh:

Once again, it is PG.

Josh:

So you don't have to worry about that.

Josh:

so here are some ads.

Josh:

we are back and in preparation for today's show, I was browsing Reddit and came across the sub Reddit writing prompts.

Josh:

So how this sub Reddit works is that users put out a writing prompt and in the comments, people write a short story based on that prompt.

Josh:

So there was a prompt from a user called mocking gasp three years ago that I really liked.

Josh:

And it said, quote, you're a super villain, your power making anybody and everybody nearby feel the same emotion you feel except a hundred times.

Josh:

Mostly you've been using it to force people to donate absolutely all of their life savings into charity

Josh:

superheroes.

Josh:

Aren't quite sure how to deal with you and quote, so great prompt.

Josh:

Great problem.

Josh:

Straight off the bat, like that's I can go a few different ways, you know?

Sean:

At first I'm like no charity, but then I'm also like life savings is

Josh:

yeah,

Sean:

ruining lives for.

Josh:

it's extreme.

Josh:

It's extreme.

Josh:

a user by the name of strawberry Coco wrote an awesome short story that I want to reenact with you guys today.

Josh:

Instead of just reading every third paragraph, however, I broke it up into roles or parts so that, uh, we can each have a, of a, of a role.

Josh:

So I'll be the narrator.

Josh:

Sean, I feel is the best of us.

Josh:

It makes sense that you play the super.

Josh:

And this is mostly because I feel John likes to be the heel or the supervisor, so he gets to be that.

Josh:

Uh, so I thought he'd appreciate that

John:

Isn't it the opposite you like being the

John:

heel?

John:

Shawn?

Sean:

I like, I think I've been thrust into the position of being the heel.

Josh:

yeah, yeah.

John:

That's true.

Josh:

I think we all play the

Josh:

heel at one point,

Sean:

Definitely.

John:

You right?

John:

You right.

John:

You

Sean:

on who's hosting the healers here.

Sean:

We gotta rotate.

Sean:

Keep it, keep it

Josh:

what week it is.

Josh:

We just fuck with each other.

Josh:

I want some emotion behind this.

Josh:

I want to feel like it's a real, story you're, you're acting.

Josh:

This is for, for a Marvel movie where you're in a paid millions of dollars.

Sean:

Good

John:

We need more Asia.

John:

We need more Asian representative.

John:

So Shawn

John:

let's do this shit,

Sean:

I've always said I could be a fucking bad Disney channel actor.

Sean:

So here we go.

Sean:

This is my audition tape.

Sean:

Uh, this so I can be Olivia Rodrigo's.

Sean:

Uh, cool uncle on some Disney show.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

And

John:

Disney.

Sean:

Oh, I

Josh:

you know what, I'm going to put some sound effects in this.

Josh:

We're going to do this for real.

John:

Oh shit.

John:

Okay.

John:

Big production.

John:

All

Josh:

Oh yeah.

John:

do to shit.

Sean:

full

Josh:

here is the story by strawberry cocoa.

Josh:

That was unnamed.

Josh:

So I gave it the name charity case.

Josh:

I hope that's okay if strawberry Coco ever listens the salvation army Santa Claus was busier than he'd ever been.

Josh:

He waved his bell.

Josh:

Eagerly is a line of people waive to place personal checks, bankers notes, and piles of literal cash in his collection bucket.

Josh:

the line, wound down the block around the corner and down a bit further, even from the.

Josh:

Heartstring watch the display from the shadows of an alley grinning to himself.

Josh:

As he projected impulses for charity and compassion into every person within range of his emotive aura, people were leaving their cars at red lights, or even in the middle of the streets to queue up and give, up their wallets for the good of others.

Josh:

Heartstring pulled a metal cigarette case and a lighter from his jacket pocket.

Josh:

All natural.

Josh:

Hand-rolled better for the environment,

Sean:

you know, consider this to be theft grand theft.

Josh:

heartstring real name, Alan Wakefield chose not to look behind him as the wish of air and a sense of mass levitated behind.

John:

The man can eat me cap, I'm doing the right thing.

John:

And you know, it

Josh:

Captain solar shook his head.

Josh:

Sadly looking over heartstrings shoulder at the line of people.

Sean:

today?

Sean:

These people are giving tomorrow.

Sean:

They'll have nothing people who have nothing start taking

John:

sounds like you have some thieves to arrest then, you know, actual crimes.

Josh:

Heart heartstring puffed his cigarette casually.

Sean:

doing is redistributing this isn't solving anything.

Sean:

It's just shuffling the inequality or.

Josh:

Captain solar placed his hand on heartstring

Josh:

shoulder,

Sean:

Stop Alan, please don't make me arrest you again.

Josh:

lowered, but with his emotive or on his flicker of irritation, magnified and spread, all of the sudden the crowd of people started to grow restless, angry, yelling.

Josh:

they were beginning to become a flash mob.

Josh:

Captain solar threw his arms around heartstrings.

Josh:

torso held him tightly with his arms pinned as he flew them boats, Skyward and pulled them out of range to affect the crowd, captain solar scowled and his through his angry teeth, barely maintaining control of themselves through the aura,

Sean:

almost did.

Sean:

Allen.

Sean:

Jesus Christ.

Josh:

the mob fizzled, as quickly as it started with the emotive aura, no longer affecting them.

Josh:

The crowd of people stood disoriented and confused.

Josh:

Some of them began staring at the money, sitting in their hands, panicking, frantically, shoving it into their.

Josh:

The salvation army Santa's found himself surrounded by a rush of people grabbing at his bucket, demanding their money back

Sean:

mess.

Sean:

Allen, another mess.

Sean:

Do you know what this means?

Sean:

Right?

Sean:

Is this when the fanfic turns on

Sean:

I'm feeling some sexual tension

Josh:

captain solar Benz over hearts,

John:

Oh, my God.

John:

Take me.

Josh:

heartstring, heartstring nodded,

John:

Solitary most likely a telepath, the babysitter to keep my powers neutralize, no other prisoners or staff within a hundred feet.

John:

So I can't manipulate my way free.

Josh:

captain solar nodded, glumly.

Josh:

The pity he felt was his own true emotion, not induced by heartstring.

Josh:

He knew how to tell the difference.

Sean:

you do it again?

Sean:

Allen?

Sean:

Knowing what awaited you, if you pulled a repeat offense.

John:

Someone has to try cap.

John:

Someone has to try to make people better.

Josh:

Captain Soler said nothing to that.

Josh:

A few spoken voice commands to his communicator and the wish of air as he redirected his flight path towards broad Creek, maximum security prison, where the only sounds made the end.

Josh:

Good job boys.

Josh:

Good job.

Josh:

Yeah.

Josh:

If that is not on Disney, plus by next year, we need to start a petition or riot or something.

Josh:

We start our

John:

bad.

John:

We're in, we're on Disney minus.

John:

We'd have to pay people.

John:

We have to pay people to listen to this shit.

Josh:

That's true.

Sean:

Fizzy plus,

Josh:

So

John:

Nice.

Josh:

I like

Sean:

thank you.

Sean:

Yeah,

Sean:

I

Josh:

It wasn't as long as Sean's fanfics usually are, but I feel it pulled at the heartstrings a little, you know, got,

Josh:

that

Josh:

emotion.

Josh:

Um,

Sean:

you'll, you'll read my X-rated rewrite of this script.

Sean:

Uh,

Josh:

I can't wait for that.

Josh:

Um, anyways, that is our show for this week.

Josh:

What did you think of the super-villain list?

Josh:

Was there one you think I missed?

Josh:

please let us know on Twitter and Instagram at Reddit on Wiki.

Josh:

If you liked the show, please consider subscribing and giving us a rating on apple podcast, Spotify, good pods or pod chaser.

Josh:

And if you really love the show and want to help support the content you listened to please consider supporting us on Patrion at patrion.com/cultivate podcast network.

Josh:

Or use the link in this scription down below to go to the page.

Josh:

You can get access to episodes a week early and free as well as a ton of other bonus episodes and other content from our other podcasts on the network.

Josh:

Thank you, WCA maniacs for listening.

Josh:

Thank you, Sean and John for, blessing us with that amazing script reading and we will see you guys next

Josh:

week.

Sean:

Do we EDM outro now,

Sean:

do I pop another one?

Josh:

the intro, but

Josh:

play it

Sean:

Oh, okay.