What's up Wikimaniacs! In this episode we had the amazing Arielle Nissenblatt join us and tell us an AITA story of her own. After that we have a co-worker whose socks just don't match, a baby shower that causes bankruptcy, a husband lashes out towards his mother-in-law, and a boyfriend is forced out of girls' night!Let us know what you think of these stories!Become a Patr…
What's up Wikimaniacs! In this episode we had the amazing Arielle Nissenblatt join us and tell us an AITA story of her own. After that we have a co-worker whose socks just don't match, a baby shower that causes bankruptcy, a husband lashes out towards his mother-in-law, and a boyfriend is forced out of girls' night!
Let us know what you think of these stories!
Become a Patreon for ad-free episodes and bonus AITA stories every week as well as exclusive content: Cultiv8 Podcast Network is creating podcasts | Patreon
Our Links:
Arielle's Socials:
Copyright 2022 Cultiv8 Podcast Network
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
What's up Wiki maniacs.
Speaker:My name is Josh shell hosts of the Reddit on Wiki podcast.
Speaker:always, I am joined by the guy who always shows up John concen, natto.
Speaker:up, John?
Speaker:Hello, I'm not contractually obligated.
Speaker:So, and I do want my perfect attendance certificate right now.
Speaker:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker:Stars across the board.
Speaker:Yes, please.
Speaker:and as you can probably guess from that, dig on Sean, he is not here today.
Speaker:Uh, Out of country.
Speaker:I think he's,
Speaker:he's in Mexico right now, living his best life.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Doing, enjoying the sun, as you can tell.
Speaker:I have not my pale complexion.
Speaker:luckily though we have an amazing guest joining us today.
Speaker:is the founder of the earbuds podcast, collective newsletter and podcast, is also the community manager at squad cast dot Fs.
Speaker:She's an expert in all things, podcasts and is extremely overqualified for this show.
Speaker:Please.
Speaker:Welcome.
Speaker:Nissin, Blatt,
Speaker:So close, so close and this and Blatt sounds like this and that
Speaker:okay.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:John, John tried to coach me to it too, and I still
Speaker:I warned
Speaker:them.
Speaker:it's really, I just learned recently.
Speaker:People would call up.
Speaker:My grandma went, you know, in the fifties and sixties and be like, hello, miss nicen Neeson.
Speaker:And she'd be like, she'd say, look, I'm, I'm happy to take your call, but you need to pronounce my name correctly first it's Nissim Blatt it's sounds exactly as it's spelled,
Speaker:you can do
Speaker:before, we have you on the show, Nissin black,
Speaker:is correct.
Speaker:Okay, perfect.
Speaker:Perfect.
Speaker:So are you doing today?
Speaker:I'm swell.
Speaker:I am in New York and the weather is turning to be not horrific.
Speaker:So I've gone on like six walks today to get some sunshine and I feel good.
Speaker:How are you?
Speaker:That's awesome.
Speaker:Um, I have not been on a walk today.
Speaker:I am very jealous And
Speaker:pale.
Speaker:and very pale.
Speaker:as we've we've already pointed out.
Speaker:So I do need the sun.
Speaker:So hopefully it comes up to Canada soon.
Speaker:so Ariel you're, you're an expert in all things podcasting, but do you also happen to be, an expert in detecting.
Speaker:I am an asshole expert, as they say.
Speaker:And you should absolutely clip that and play it out of context.
Speaker:That's a, yeah, that's absolutely going everywhere.
Speaker:Yes, I, um, I recently encountered an asshole.
Speaker:Do you want a little side story?
Speaker:I
Speaker:Please.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:Very good.
Speaker:Very good.
Speaker:And, um, I don't mean the body part.
Speaker:I mean, I encountered somebody who was, it was not cool.
Speaker:I am watching my parents dog and I had some friends coming over.
Speaker:so I went to greet my friends, Uber when it was arriving and I took the dog and I forgot to take a poop bag and the dog unexpectedly poops, and I'm a few houses down I noticed that the dogs pooping.
Speaker:So I think.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:I need to turn around run and get a poop bag before somebody notices that I've left a shit on a lot.
Speaker:And as I go to turn around, I noticed that somebody is in their car watching me and, you know, it could have gone one of two ways.
Speaker:They could have said nothing or they could have said something.
Speaker:and then within that, if they were to say something, they could have been nice about it and they could have been assholes about it.
Speaker:They decided to be assholes about it.
Speaker:Here's what happened.
Speaker:This woman rolled down her window.
Speaker:There was a man in the passenger seat and she is saying to me, are you going to pick up that bag of poop?
Speaker:Are you going to pick up that poop?
Speaker:And I, and I was like, hi, then the man was cursing at me.
Speaker:You can't fucking leave.
Speaker:Am I allowed to curse?
Speaker:By all
Speaker:means.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:This guy was cursing at me about leaving a poop on a lawn.
Speaker:And it's like, first of all, give me the benefit of the doubt walking back, but it looks like I'm sprinting away from the scene of the crime.
Speaker:So I understand where they're coming from.
Speaker:So they're yelling at me.
Speaker:I said, hi, I'm about to go get a bag to pick up the.
Speaker:Everything's going to be okay.
Speaker:And they were like, you better go pick it up.
Speaker:And I was like, yep, I am.
Speaker:I'm doing that.
Speaker:And then they said, well, even so you can't let the dog poop on the lawn.
Speaker:And I said, okay, I didn't understand your neighborhood's protocol when it comes to Poupon lawn, because in some places that's where dogs go to the bathroom.
Speaker:I
Speaker:don't
Speaker:know exactly what am I supposed to do?
Speaker:Walk them like the, the, the dog doesn't specifically know to go to the bathroom.
Speaker:Only on my lawn.
Speaker:I don't ha it's a puppy.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Oh exactly.
Speaker:even regular dogs like Nora, like adult dogs,
Speaker:Thank you.
Speaker:they don't diff differentiate.
Speaker:I agree with that.
Speaker:So I was like, I'll be right back.
Speaker:And she said, we'll be waiting.
Speaker:And I said, great.
Speaker:So then I came back I picked up the poop and I was seizing an anger they were like, oh, thank you so much for picking it up, but not in a nice way.
Speaker:And I said, I'm.
Speaker:I said, look, I'm not a bad guy.
Speaker:I was never going to leave this, this excrement on the.
Speaker:And they, of course, you know, and I tried to think about it from their perspective.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:There are people who poop and dash, I am not one of those people.
Speaker:I am not one of those dog owners, but how are they supposed to know that?
Speaker:So then I thought, it's okay that they wanted to say something.
Speaker:I don't want people leaving poop on my lawn, but they could have said it in such a nicer way and not cursed at me, you know?
Speaker:So I give them the
Speaker:asshole mark
Speaker:I would give them asshole Mike's as well.
Speaker:Yeah, I get where they're coming from.
Speaker:Like if you see someone and then it looks like they're not going to pick it up, just say like,
Speaker:Hey
Speaker:you mind like picking it, up?
Speaker:and then if they're confrontational, maybe then you can, you can
Speaker:be shitty about it, but they, but they, they assumed violence.
Speaker:They assumed that I was like this millennial interloper in their neighborhood and I was ready to just poop and dash don't assume the word.
Speaker:To be fair you're you're in New York, so I don't know what else you expected there.
Speaker:Yeah, we're assholes here.
Speaker:Not everyone, not everyone.
Speaker:Um, but, that is a great story to get us into, , the episode for today.
Speaker:, So, no poop stories today.
Speaker:Ah.
Speaker:that kind of asshole stories, but on today's show, we have a coworker who socks just don't match a baby shower, causes a bankruptcy, husband lashes out towards his mother-in-law and a boyfriend is forced out of girls night.
Speaker:we are going to hop into the first story of the day.
Speaker:Am I the asshole for embarrassing my colleague by laughing at his socks.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:need more context, but very asshole issue.
Speaker:Ready?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:You know, laughing at anyone's pretty mean.
Speaker:It's true.
Speaker:but, we'll jump into it.
Speaker:So I, a 28 year old female, I'm an employee working for a large company with several departments.
Speaker:There's this new guy That I see often at reception from another.
Speaker:He's good-looking whereas nice suits, but as socks are just, they weird, they're colorful and have patterns and animals and totally don't match what he's wearing.
Speaker:Like they really stand out and you can't help, but notice them
Speaker:That sounds like a good thing to me.
Speaker:Yeah, exactly.
Speaker:Uh, he's been here for two months and has basically been wearing those unmatching socks.
Speaker:Religiously.
Speaker:Some of my colleagues laughed at him, but they don't him and rarely see him.
Speaker:So no harm in that last week, I was in a meeting with him and other employees from different departments.
Speaker:I sat in the corner, but couldn't help staring at his socks and trying to contain my laughter.
Speaker:He noticed, but didn't say anything until he caught me looking at them again.
Speaker:That's when he sort of snapped and said, been looking at my feet and laughing.
Speaker:Is there a problem?
Speaker:I finally just let it laugh and said, I'm sorry.
Speaker:just these penguin socks, everyone stared at them and then laughed.
Speaker:He looked around and then immediately went back to the project.
Speaker:Let me just say it got awkward after that.
Speaker:This sounds like the stupidest thing I've ever heard, who makes fun of people for what they choose to wear.
Speaker:This person is an asshole.
Speaker:I feel like not even giving this any more thought, like I'm, I'm angry at this person because they thought that this was something worthy of writing.
Speaker:Like this person is an asshole
Speaker:As someone who has zero fashion sense whatsoever.
Speaker:And I identify as Winston from new girl, cause I have a lot of clothing that involves animals in it.
Speaker:So if someone makes fun of my penguin shirt, I will throw hands with
Speaker:you should.
Speaker:First of all this person, she said, he's a good looking guy.
Speaker:He usually dresses.
Speaker:Well, clearly he is making a choice to wear these socks.
Speaker:So not only is she wrong for not understanding his fashion style, but she's wrong for like, thinking that this is a laughing matter.
Speaker:I don't know the way that he confronted her was a little weird, but we also have to go off of the narrator's writing.
Speaker:And I don't necessarily think that this person is a reliable narrator.
Speaker:Do you discuss this on the show?
Speaker:They report their own stories.
Speaker:So often, you know, they might be not telling the most truthful version of it.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:We don't hit on that enough, but you you're a hundred percent, right?
Speaker:Uh, it.
Speaker:could be like maybe she was out openly laughing at him before he finally addressed it.
Speaker:these assholes are self-reporting, which is.
Speaker:if I saw someone laughing at me, I wouldn't assume immediately it was my feet, you know?
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:does seem weird that he was like, why are you laughing at my feet?
Speaker:Like, I just be like, why are you laughing?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So it does seem like a little bit of a suspect,
Speaker:I call bullshit on this story.
Speaker:I feel like there might be something else going on and, or, or she just wanted to post in this Reddit sub channel.
Speaker:What is it called?
Speaker:Sub Reddit.
Speaker:And she was like looking for an excuse, but this is like, I am angry at this prompt.
Speaker:I do not think that I, I think she is an asshole, but I also think that she is a bad narrator and this story didn't happen.
Speaker:I call bullshit on the entire thing.
Speaker:I like that.
Speaker:She, she does go on, um, Okay, I'm going to be honest.
Speaker:It doesn't make her look any better.
Speaker:so she, she ends up going to HR and explaining, and then tells her basically she's in the wrong.
Speaker:but I'll skip ahead.
Speaker:so she said, I felt so terrible.
Speaker:I went back to my department and told my coworkers what happened.
Speaker:They told me he's egotistical and deserved the embarrassment because what did he expect when he decided to wear stuff like that out and get attention?
Speaker:Besides it wasn't like I made a direct comments about the socks.
Speaker:I just laughed quietly and did my best to not let it show.
Speaker:he brought it up.
Speaker:this entire situation makes me nauseous because he seems like a nice guy, but I think we got off on the wrong foot sort of speaking
Speaker:Hat.
Speaker:Maybe he flew off the handle.
Speaker:I the asshole though?
Speaker:Um,
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:It sounds like the co-workers are more of assholes.
Speaker:Holy shit.
Speaker:I'm going to go to the Sean route since he's not here.
Speaker:Shawn, shout out to you, by the way.
Speaker:They're all assholes.
Speaker:Yeah, every one sucks.
Speaker:First of all, I get it.
Speaker:I wear colorful socks.
Speaker:I do.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Men in work pants.
Speaker:I imagine this is the type of office where you sit down, you cross your leg over the other one, and then your, your work sock shows.
Speaker:And that's your one way of showing that you have a little bit of style.
Speaker:Cause otherwise you have to wear like a suit and dress pants.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:So people who choose to wear colorful socks.
Speaker:Good for you.
Speaker:You're making a statement and he's doing it all the time.
Speaker:Great.
Speaker:I think this is not in the original posters, best interest to say something or especially to have outdid herself as an asshole by posting it.
Speaker:There's no reason for that.
Speaker:man.
Speaker:Yeah, it makes me mad.
Speaker:Cause I am someone when I was in the corporate world and like went to an office, I would wear fun socks because it was like, this is a fun thing.
Speaker:It's flare.
Speaker:a bad day, I looked down, see some fun socks.
Speaker:It's an, It's a, it's a little pick me up in a dreary gray office, you know?
Speaker:definitely the asshole.
Speaker:if it happened to be like he was wearing something inappropriate.
Speaker:Sure.
Speaker:You can bring that up to
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:but seems like he's just got the socks.
Speaker:So I don't,
Speaker:a penguin socks.
Speaker:Come on.
Speaker:How could you not love penguin
Speaker:socks?
Speaker:They're so
Speaker:Penguins are adorable.
Speaker:He's adorable.
Speaker:And I think that this woman who has presumably been at this job for longer has her friends, they have their echo chamber.
Speaker:They go, and they talk about their coworkers.
Speaker:How about instead, let him in
Speaker:Bam preach.
Speaker:call him in.
Speaker:I like these takes.
Speaker:so I think we can all agree, A hundred percent.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:A hundred percent.
Speaker:I have more, if we wanted to
Speaker:put the, if we wanted to put the onus on this guy at all for calling her out, I still don't even think that's.
Speaker:You know, if we want to say that she was 50%, the asshole, he was 50% the asshole.
Speaker:I don't think so.
Speaker:I think she is left.
Speaker:Let's say 98% to 2%.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:Maybe what he said to her was a little aggressive, but also if you're being laughed at you're going to respond aggressively.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:Especially in a room full of your
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:that you kind of, like, you've only been there for so many weeks.
Speaker:Like you don't really know these people.
Speaker:so you're kind of in an awkward position and someone with social anxiety that would, would
Speaker:There's a way to think that somebody has shitty fashion quietly.
Speaker:You can do that quietly.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:also just like A bad take socks or cute, cute socks, or even cuter.
Speaker:Be cool.
Speaker:Done asshole
Speaker:Bam.
Speaker:All right, well, we'll leave it at that And, we will go on to our second story.
Speaker:am I the asshole for keeping all of the money from mine and my wife's baby?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:Oh boy.
Speaker:so, my wife, 24 year old female and I, 29 year old male are having our first baby boy.
Speaker:We were due in may.
Speaker:so we had our shower last weekend Her family didn't really plan the whole thing other than decorating.
Speaker:So I ended up purchasing a venue as I wanted to make a big deal of this to my wife, to make her feel special.
Speaker:I spent $2,500 on the venue, which I was prepared to do and okay with my wife wanted something SMALLER initially, but I wanted to do the co-ed thing and invite my friends and family too after paying for the place.
Speaker:My account was depleted and I won't be paid again for two weeks We ended up getting around 1600.
Speaker:So I ended up only paying for less than a thousand for the shower.
Speaker:My wife is upset about this because she feels as if the money should be used for more baby things and not to pay myself back as she put it.
Speaker:I told her I can't just have $0 in my bank account for two weeks.
Speaker:And she said, I should have thought of that before booking such a big space for the shower, instead of doing something smaller, like she originally wanted.
Speaker:my god because she's also upset because a majority of the money came from her family.
Speaker:GOD I honestly, assumed
Speaker:any money we got back was going into paying for the shower and she assumed it would be going to for whatever else we didn't get at our registry I can't help, but feel like she's being ungrateful about the situation, but I also possibly shouldn't have, should have planned ahead.
Speaker:So I wouldn't be left with no money.
Speaker:I will probably use the money on the baby stuff.
Speaker:Anyway, however, I need gas and food money as Am I the asshole here?
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:First of all, I have so many, I should've written it down because he's wrong on, in so
Speaker:many different directions.
Speaker:He said he wanted to pay for this venue.
Speaker:He said, I was completely comfortable doing this.
Speaker:He said, I knew what this would be.
Speaker:There's so much, there's so much here.
Speaker:First of all, she said she was okay.
Speaker:Doing it at their house.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:Then this is completely
Speaker:on you,
Speaker:that's a good take because if you, were comfortable, as he said that he wanted to do this, and this was something he was comfortable doing,
Speaker:You should have the money
Speaker:to be able to be comfortable doing that.
Speaker:Otherwise.
Speaker:you're just
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:What do you mean comfortable?
Speaker:Do you mean comfortable theoretically, because this is not theoretical.
Speaker:It's a thing that happened.
Speaker:The part that cracked me up the most was he was like, I want it to make my wife feel special, but I do want my money back
Speaker:though.
Speaker:What a day?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:How God also, I feel you should have more money saved.
Speaker:This is maybe a judgment, but I feel used to have more money saved up.
Speaker:If you're about to have a baby, you know what I mean?
Speaker:a joint bank account.
Speaker:Fine.
Speaker:Like maybe there should be a segment of your income that you share and yeah, maybe that's your gift portion.
Speaker:And if you need to be, I don't know.
Speaker:I think you need to be able to have money in your account that if you are going to pay from your own pocket for.
Speaker:For this event, then you also need to have money in your own pocket to pay for your gas.
Speaker:That should not come from your
Speaker:exactly.
Speaker:has this dude never heard of,
Speaker:uh, you know, a credit card where you can you know, pay for things until you get paid?
Speaker:Like, there's a few different ways to get a gun about this.
Speaker:just went the wrong way.
Speaker:Every, single turn
Speaker:If you're comfortable shelling out $2,500 for a baby shower that could otherwise have taken place at your house.
Speaker:And you did not have to pay for a venue then I'm sorry to say.
Speaker:I think you should have planned ahead enough to have gas money.
Speaker:Absolutely
Speaker:I think it was just one of those situations where if you wanted to book a venue, that it was kinda more of like a, a flex, like, Hey, I'm going to put on a little facade for like the gram, but guess what?
Speaker:My guy hashtag you done fucked up.
Speaker:So
Speaker:I'm just saying you should've been more prepared for that.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I think the
Speaker:only other thing I would say is like, we've, we've hit on the venue a lot, but just to hit it again, like, I don't know many people who do it at a
Speaker:No, it's
Speaker:I've had friends have a baby shower like, yeah, parent's house.
Speaker:or friend's house.
Speaker:in a backyard, you know, it doesn't have to be a fancy thing.
Speaker:It's just people getting together to celebrate a baby.
Speaker:Also, if you were going to spend money on the baby anyway, with these dollars, then don't be weird about it.
Speaker:Don't put it all in your account.
Speaker:Just say, Hey wife, I need to borrow $50 for gas.
Speaker:I'm still going to put the rest of this 16, $1,100 or whatever.
Speaker:I just did the math very wrong.
Speaker:I'm going to put the rest of this money in a place where we can both access it, but I'm borrowing this much to
Speaker:cover my expenses between now and the next time that I get
Speaker:paid.
Speaker:There's so
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:this.
Speaker:If you need the money.
Speaker:the mature thing to do is be like, Hey, would you mind if I took like 500 of this.
Speaker:until I get paid next Uh, like instead of just being like, oh, I need $1,600.
Speaker:How much does, I mean, I know gas is expensive and food has gone up, but think that's absurd to, if you're paying for much money.
Speaker:for two weeks of a, of, until you get paid.
Speaker:you're getting robbed wherever you're going.
Speaker:so I don't know if there's anything else you guys wanted to hit on.
Speaker:I got, I got one thing that I might, I feel like this, that is going to be one of those dads someday, where he ends up, ends up raising the kid and he's going to end up telling the kid, Hey, you know, I raised you.
Speaker:I paid, or I paid for all your bills.
Speaker:Therefore you owe me when you grow up type of situation.
Speaker:He seems
Speaker:like
Speaker:that
Speaker:better be taken me out to dinner when I come to college because I came to visit
Speaker:you at college.
Speaker:Oh, you're a hundred percent right with that
Speaker:this sounds like one of the dads who, um,
Speaker:Oh,
Speaker:okay.
Speaker:No, I have a story.
Speaker:I was watching a tick talk and it was a gender reveal.
Speaker:And the wife pitched to the husband, a balloon and the man struck the balloon with a bat and it was blue.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:So they were having a boy, presumably, and the wife, you could see her getting all excited.
Speaker:She wants she's smiling.
Speaker:She wants to hug the husband.
Speaker:His group of 15 friends comes and like does a mosh pit with
Speaker:him.
Speaker:And she's the wife has left.
Speaker:On the outside of the mosh pit, it was the saddest thing I've ever seen.
Speaker:Oh, that's so cringy.
Speaker:It was
Speaker:hit him and do anything but nut
Speaker:she's doing all the work.
Speaker:it was terrible.
Speaker:was a girl,
Speaker:you think they cheered if it
Speaker:what, one of the most like comments said was like
Speaker:I just want to know what the opposite would have been.
Speaker:Oh, yeah, we got flack from our, our big tick dock when John said it was misogynistic for boys to only want boys.
Speaker:and he's a hundred percent, right.
Speaker:I don't care how many bad comments we get about,
Speaker:Yeah,
Speaker:They hate me for that, but it's okay.
Speaker:yeah, it's fine.
Speaker:It's fine.
Speaker:if you're not polarizing,
Speaker:you're not making friends.
Speaker:exactly.
Speaker:that video has got 3 million views come at me.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Who cares?
Speaker:It's paying the bills.
Speaker:exactly.
Speaker:so we're going to take a quick break and then after the ad read, we will be right back with two more mid assholes.
Speaker:So stay tuned.
Speaker:All right.
Speaker:We are back, Ariel is knocking out of the park.
Speaker:This episode, absolutely thrashing these assholes.
Speaker:So I appreciate.
Speaker:nervous.
Speaker:Huh?
Speaker:Do you get nervous talking about this?
Speaker:Because you could say something that you don't necessarily agree with.
Speaker:Can I make that disclaimer, like right now I'm reacting in the moment, but it could be that if I were to think about this.
Speaker:With some friends talk it over with like my dog.
Speaker:I might have a different
Speaker:reaction later.
Speaker:can we, can we allow ourselves that
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:Only if you
Speaker:send
Speaker:us
Speaker:the video of you talking your dog about
Speaker:stitch us,
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:actually, you could do that.
Speaker:You could just stitch our story with, uh, if you have any follow up thoughts or something on tick-tock, that'd be cool.
Speaker:I like that.
Speaker:so let's jump into our next story.
Speaker:Am I the asshole for refusing to make my husband apologize for what he said to my mom at the dinner table?
Speaker:Refusing to
Speaker:make my husband apol.
Speaker:I need context right
Speaker:now written extremely confusingly.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:I we've had a few of these where it's the wife having to do something for the husband to be like a mediator.
Speaker:We've had a couple of these and it's always weird.
Speaker:So,
Speaker:so I, a 31 year old female recently got married to my husband, Scott, a 36 year old male before I met him.
Speaker:I was engaged to my former fiance Martin, but we broke it off because this relationship was sort of pushed by my family because he was a doctor And comes from a wealthy man.
Speaker:our relationship ended, my mom was devastated.
Speaker:She did her best to bring us back together.
Speaker:For example, she lied to Martin about me being pregnant to save us
Speaker:Whoa.
Speaker:which already
Speaker:Martin is the first husband.
Speaker:Yeah, Scott is
Speaker:sorry.
Speaker:Yes, Martin is the first husband.
Speaker:so she lied to him about her being pregnant so that they would get back together.
Speaker:Yeah, cool.
Speaker:Cool.
Speaker:Cool.
Speaker:That was years ago.
Speaker:Now we're all on good terms, including Martin.
Speaker:My mom has a bit of attention towards Scott She treats him well, but constantly makes passive nagging comments about him.
Speaker:She compares them to Martin all the time, which bothers both of us, but we try to let it slow.
Speaker:Mom kept telling Scott about the diamond ring, new car and bank account Martin Got for his fiance and kept sending him photos saying how generous Martin is to his fiance.
Speaker:Then compared him to Scott and what he had done for me, her to stop doing this.
Speaker:And she apologized last week.
Speaker:We were all over at my parent's house for a social gathering.
Speaker:A lot of relatives came and we had to do.
Speaker:At the dinner table.
Speaker:Mom asked Scott.
Speaker:If he saw the text, she sent him the other day.
Speaker:He said he was sorry.
Speaker:And he didn't notice.
Speaker:She told him to check it right then and read it.
Speaker:out loud to everyone at the table.
Speaker:he took the phone and started reading the text out loud.
Speaker:Her text mentioned how Martin got his fiance, a new house and how generous he was then said that Martin is younger than Scott yet was able to buy a house, basically shaming Scott for his inability to buy a house.
Speaker:those digs.
Speaker:As, as a millennial who can't afford a house I've I feel that one.
Speaker:So
Speaker:the home prices, when these people were RH
Speaker:completely different.
Speaker:Anyway, this is not the point
Speaker:Cost like a loaf of bread for them to
Speaker:get a mansion back in the day.
Speaker:This some
Speaker:she wrapped up by saying that Martin, maybe wasn't so bad for me after.
Speaker:I was shocked.
Speaker:And Scott was pissed, obviously, however, he didn't lash out or anything.
Speaker:He looked at the texts, smiled and said you know, what gets me about this entire text is how you were a public educator for 30 years.
Speaker:Yet you can't differentiate between the passive you and the contraction.
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:Good.
Speaker:Gosh,
Speaker:He
Speaker:thought the thought of all the children that must have been left behind everyone at the table, busted into laughter.
Speaker:And my mom's face went pale.
Speaker:She decided to leave the table.
Speaker:then she and my sister started yelling at me saying Scott was being awfully rude and I needed to get them to apologize immediately for embarrassing.
Speaker:My mom at the.
Speaker:I refuse to tell him to apologize.
Speaker:Then pointed out she was being judgemental towards him.
Speaker:She defended herself by saying she was letting him know.
Speaker:And he had no confidence and took it personally.
Speaker:I left, but I kept getting told to talk to him and get him to apologize for what he Am I the asshole?
Speaker:So here's the situation.
Speaker:This woman should not be put in a position to be the mediator.
Speaker:And that's that what should happen is Scott and the mom need to get together alone and hash things out.
Speaker:And that's it.
Speaker:That's it.
Speaker:Scott needs to say, you made me feel like shit, comparing me to this ex-husband and the mom needs to say.
Speaker:You made me feel stupid when you told, when you said that I was a public educator yet, I didn't know something that I should have known and they should both eat Crow on the things that they did
Speaker:wrong.
Speaker:And that should be that.
Speaker:I agree, to a point I think, so the mom's obviously an asshole.
Speaker:Uh, think that's something we can all agree on.
Speaker:but I think you're the asshole for not standing up to your mom, uh, because if my mom or dad ever, ever talked to my girlfriend, The way your mom is, I would have lost it on them and I would have sold them.
Speaker:If you're not going to treat it properly, then we're not going to hang
Speaker:You and there, she said,
Speaker:oh, I mean like way back when, when she was originally sending him texts and stuff like that, like, I would've, I would've laid down the law and said, this stops now no more of this, or we don't
Speaker:communicate.
Speaker:I agree.
Speaker:However, there are some things in family dynamics, I think that have to be
Speaker:dealt with over time and delicately, and maybe they just didn't think that this was the fight to pick at that time.
Speaker:Maybe there are other
Speaker:fights going on and this isn't the biggest one on 14.
Speaker:That's fair too.
Speaker:I don't know the full dynamics.
Speaker:So you're, you're right about that.
Speaker:and I'll say that she is a secondary asshole because she's reacting to like what her mom is doing.
Speaker:So I just think, you know, man, woman who does it doesn't matter your, but you should always stick up for your spouse if someone's talking to them like that.
Speaker:but again, as you said, I don't know the dynamics.
Speaker:So, I'm just saying asshole on what, what I do
Speaker:It is so messed up to talk.
Speaker:I feel like once somebody is out of your life from a relationship, that person should not exist unless you have kids together and have to deal with them, have to deal with the, the DNA that you've
Speaker:mixed.
Speaker:But that, like goodbye.
Speaker:I I'm I'm similar.
Speaker:Um, I do know, like I think John or we talked about whether axes are fine in your life.
Speaker:I don't know it was
Speaker:yeah.
Speaker:Um, it's yeah, it was, it was a conversation where like, I think it was the one where it was
Speaker:she was too close
Speaker:to her ex like they're same, yes.
Speaker:Same area.
Speaker:And it's okay.
Speaker:I, I don't have an inherent problem with it.
Speaker:it's just, I would never, I don't talk to my exes.
Speaker:I feel the need to.
Speaker:Yeah, It's just, I cut them out.
Speaker:Shout out to all
Speaker:but I get it if
Speaker:this right now.
Speaker:but yeah, I agree.
Speaker:I agree to a point and this definitely crosses a line where the moms faking a pregnancy to get them back
Speaker:Um, yeah, that's so that's so shallow.
Speaker:I'm just like hyper fixated on the mom being such a dig like mom, you, your however, you teach it, you were to Azle and I'm not even mad at, at Scott would that retort because it, sometimes some people just kind of, you keep digging at someone eventually they're going to, they're going to surface.
Speaker:I'm to
Speaker:that Sur yeah, that surf, that surface might be.
Speaker:embarrassing someone in front of a massive crowd, which is fine, but yeah, I'm just really fixated on the mom being an asshole.
Speaker:But I do agree with Ariel.
Speaker:It is not the wife's place to be that it's between
Speaker:them too.
Speaker:It seems like they're the ones beefing, so
Speaker:I agree.
Speaker:I think, yeah.
Speaker:They
Speaker:need to
Speaker:sit down privately and have a conversation about it.
Speaker:like what the, what the boyfriend did or the husband did is, is mild in comparison to What
Speaker:Oh, absolutely.
Speaker:What she did, but just to have a conversation and just lay down some ground rules where this, this never happens again.
Speaker:So, two assholes and, and A kind of an asshole, I guess we'll go with that
Speaker:situation.
Speaker:complicated assholes.
Speaker:We'll
Speaker:we'll move on to our last story of this episode.
Speaker:So am I the a$$hole for making my boyfriend feel uncomfortable after he insisted on joining us on girls' night?
Speaker:Um, yeah,
Speaker:no, no.
Speaker:The
Speaker:boyfriends didn't asshole.
Speaker:No.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:We'll get I'll.
Speaker:I'll wait for more
Speaker:context.
Speaker:The initial reaction is fun and then we should like SU
Speaker:we should super cut the
Speaker:initial reaction with when we have context.
Speaker:Sometimes it does change sometimes.
Speaker:Cause, and I like doing that, getting the, the initial, it really is telling you how people can title things to sound
Speaker:These are again, reminder that these people are self-reporting,
Speaker:which is
Speaker:a strange thing to
Speaker:100%.
Speaker:I do not call
Speaker:myself out.
Speaker:I
Speaker:bury that.
Speaker:I seem like an angel.
Speaker:a, I just wish people keep sending
Speaker:these
Speaker:things in because you know, this is how we keep our podcasts go.
Speaker:True by roasting our listeners.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:so my boyfriend, a 27 year old male started asking to join me in on girls' night.
Speaker:Every time I tried to say no, he would be like, I have to join or you have to cancel It made
Speaker:me.
Speaker:Oh, h**l no.
Speaker:Guys, I am two sentences in, it made me and the girls miserable.
Speaker:Having to sit there with him in the middle this past Friday, he insisted to join us again.
Speaker:I had enough and came up with an idea to get him hating, hanging out with us.
Speaker:I made a plan and told the girls what we were going to do, and they were down for it.
Speaker:I just want to make it clear that I'm listening through out of respect to you and out of respect to this, but this guy is an asshole.
Speaker:Such an asshole.
Speaker:There is no, this is controlling behavior.
Speaker:This is you should break as Dan Savage would say, dump the mother fucking asshole.
Speaker:okay.
Speaker:You may continue, but you should know that
Speaker:I am listening
Speaker:while seeding.
Speaker:Yes, it is noted.
Speaker:I want everyone to take note.
Speaker:I am also reading this.
Speaker:I know the but I am also seeing it.
Speaker:So, the girls came and my boyfriend immediately sat with us and started ruining our conversation by steering them towards, him/his work/his achievements.
Speaker:Oh, my
Speaker:Here's what I did.
Speaker:I started bringing up gross/embarrassing subjects and the girls were eating them up by talking about them in detail subjects, like sex periods, cramps, diarrhea, leg, hair, and farts, we talked about this stuff in boring detail.
Speaker:Like I could feel his discomfort without even looking at him, but God.
Speaker:when I turned to see why he got quiet, suddenly he was getting red in the face and had sweat all over his forhead I bet he found that he found himself unable to relate to these subjects.
Speaker:And thus couldn't take part in the conversation.
Speaker:He got up from the couch, ready to head out.
Speaker:I looked at him and asked where he was going.
Speaker:And he was like, I just remembered that I have an important meeting with a guy in about 10 minutes and, uh, I have to go now he rushed out, telling us to have fun, the girls and I started laughing hysterically.
Speaker:Later on.
Speaker:He came home and berated me for saying, I made him feel uncomfortable slash sick with the horrible subjects I kept bringing up.
Speaker:I said, what are you talking about?
Speaker:This is this typical stuff.
Speaker:Girls talk about all the time, but he insisted, I made him upset and caused him to leave.
Speaker:He declined to speak with me and has been
Speaker:quiet
Speaker:ever since.
Speaker:I declined this invitation to conversing with my girlfriend.
Speaker:Oh my God.
Speaker:So am I the a$$hole What do you guys
Speaker:my
Speaker:this guy.
Speaker:You need to break up with this guy.
Speaker:he has really bad control issues and he not only does he sound like, what does that, what's that syndrome called the, uh,
Speaker:Like Stockholm syndrome,
Speaker:no, like the video, the video game one, the main character syndrome.
Speaker:He seems like this guy has major main character syndrome that everything has to revolve around him, but no, my God.
Speaker:You don't have to show up to your
Speaker:girls shit.
Speaker:Like that's their time to be girls, you know,
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:you have or something?
Speaker:don't you, why don't you go take up woodworking or some other manly shit that's out there.
Speaker:I don't fucking know.
Speaker:Go to Bumble for friends or something.
Speaker:Fine.
Speaker:You, buddy, that you can be friends with.
Speaker:Don't go to your girls.
Speaker:Shit.
Speaker:Brought us their private
Speaker:time
Speaker:together.
Speaker:Oh
Speaker:If, the men or the significant others are so lucky to be invited every once in a while to girl's night girls night in, then they are completely on the
Speaker:turf of the people who are running this.
Speaker:And that means that you
Speaker:They should be.
Speaker:whatever they're talking about or you're quiet.
Speaker:But you do not judge.
Speaker:And you do not like make up a weird excuse or, and also, I don't know the, the, the way that they reacted when he got up and walked away, giggling about how they got rid of him sounds like seventh grade.
Speaker:And like, all of you should not be in relationships, or I don't know, they should be advised.
Speaker:Her friends should be advising her to dump this guy.
Speaker:This guy is gross.
Speaker:I hope they all hate him.
Speaker:And also that's what he's doing.
Speaker:If he wants to be in this woman's life long
Speaker:term, he's not doing it right.
Speaker:No.
Speaker:And as you guys keep saying, it is like, it's a very manipulative thing.
Speaker:Like when, when my girlfriend says, I got girls night, this Friday, I'm like, cool, no worries.
Speaker:Like, I'll DD, if you need me to, that's the extent of that.
Speaker:your significant other has to have their own life, their own friends, their own interests, and you gotta be okay with letting them do that kind of thing.
Speaker:Like be themselves basically.
Speaker:And it's a control that, and to force yourself into that is just so fucked up on so many different levels.
Speaker:And he is such an asshole for, for even saying that the first thing he said when he was like, you either invite me or, or it's not
Speaker:That
Speaker:that's f**ked up.
Speaker:so bad.
Speaker:That's so
Speaker:I'm like, dude, you sound
Speaker:like
Speaker:a creep and ended up you and then you berate her afterwards.
Speaker:Like no shit guy, like you're not even, this is like an a and B conversations.
Speaker:We'll see your ass at home later.
Speaker:You know?
Speaker:I'm like,
Speaker:no,
Speaker:I,
Speaker:that guy, that guy, some.
Speaker:Oh, a hundred percent.
Speaker:So he's definitely the asshole.
Speaker:maybe a little childish on how you handled It I would have just dumped him,
Speaker:but, you know,
Speaker:is what It
Speaker:it
Speaker:that you have to dump somebody.
Speaker:So I really hope.
Speaker:People are responding to you within Reddit and telling you that this guy is controlling, that you will, you will ultimately be happier if you get rid of him.
Speaker:And if you must date somebody find somebody who does not intrude
Speaker:on your Hangouts with your.
Speaker:friends
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:And actually know that you talked about that she did update the Reddit post and said, she realized now that he was being very controlling and, uh, thanks to Reddit.
Speaker:I believe she is right now, so for her.
Speaker:We had a good story.
Speaker:Happy in.
Speaker:Um,
Speaker:ending.
Speaker:Happy fairytale ending.
Speaker:so that is it for this episode.
Speaker:What did you guys think where these people assholes not assholes or was everyone an asshole?
Speaker:Ariel, thank you for coming on the episode today.
Speaker:if you wouldn't mind, please let the wicked maniacs know where they can find you and maybe a little bit more about
Speaker:what you do.
Speaker:Yeah, thank you for having me.
Speaker:This was a ton of fun, pretty different from the episodes that I usually am
Speaker:a guest on, which is talking about podcasts.
Speaker:So this was, an exercise in, I got to curse a lot more than I normally do, which I love.
Speaker:Um, and I got to pontificate on things that Are
Speaker:Not qualified to pontificate on, although I, as I said, yeah,
Speaker:it's good
Speaker:though.
Speaker:It's good.
Speaker:It's good.
Speaker:It's a good exercise.
Speaker:You know, you can find me by Googling Ariel Nissen, Blatt.
Speaker:I am the only one who exists and I would love to be proven wrong.
Speaker:So if you two are an area on this and
Speaker:please feel free to let me know, but I doubt it.
Speaker:I've looked it up
Speaker:Then you have to fight them right.
Speaker:There can only be one.
Speaker:right.
Speaker:but if you search my name, you'll find all my social media.
Speaker:You'll find all of my podcasts, everything that you could possibly want from me.
Speaker:I listen to a lot of podcasts.
Speaker:That's what I do.
Speaker:I listen to podcasts.
Speaker:I consult on podcast, podcasts, marketing, podcast, growth, even editorial, whatever you need, I can probably help you make your podcast better in some way.
Speaker:So if you want to learn more from me, where I'm most active is Twitter
Speaker:at Ari.
Speaker:Awesome.
Speaker:And, uh, we can actually speak to her counseling cause she did, counsel is very early on, in our podcasting days.
Speaker:I want to say like
Speaker:August
Speaker:when we first started.
Speaker:Yeah, August last year.
Speaker:it was pretty early on
Speaker:She doesn't even remember because
Speaker:many of them.
Speaker:she
Speaker:I, I remember you guys specifically.
Speaker:I don't remember it
Speaker:being that long ago.
Speaker:COVID just that time doesn't exist.
Speaker:but definitely go check out Ariel's, Twitter and, podcast.
Speaker:they are amazing resources.
Speaker:If You have a podcast or thinking about starting one, so go check that out.
Speaker:huge thanks to all of our listeners.
Speaker:if you would like your story to be read on the show, please send it to wiki@retinolwikipodatgmail.com or DMS on Instagram and Twitter at Reddit on Wiki.
Speaker:Thank you, John, for showing up today.
Speaker:Thank you Ariel for coming on.
Speaker:we appreciate you replacing Sean.
Speaker:I I'd like to say, uh, you did a very good job.
Speaker:You were amazing.
Speaker:You been amazing.
Speaker:trashing trashing those assholes.
Speaker:So, we really appreciate that.
Speaker:so, thank you again, Wiki maniacs.
Founder
Arielle Nissenblatt is the founder of EarBuds Podcast Collective, a weekly podcast newsletter and podcast. She is the Community Manager at SquadCast.fm, a remote recording platform. She is a graduate of the Salt Institute of Audio Documentary Studies. Nissenblatt is a podcast marketing expert, having spoken on panels at conferences such as Podcast Movement, International Documentary Association’s Podcast Day, at USC, Montana Media Lab, American University, and more. She is one of the founders of Podcast Taxonomy, an international effort to categorize roles and credits in the podcast industry. Nissenblatt listens to over 40 hours of audio content per week. She is a podcast industry futurist and believes in the power of audio to break down cultural barriers.